My parents married at 18 years of age because of my impending arrival. My mother and I—along with my brother, who came along 15 months later—lived with my maternal grandparents for the first few years of my life. My dad was in the US Air Force and stationed far away,...


As I began to write this I wanted to start with who I am. But that is hard for me because, even in my mid-thirties, I am still not very sure. I know what I am not. I know what I am not supposed to be. I know what I want to be. But I am not exactly sure who I am I was...


I was kidnapped when I was 8 months old. My father snuck me out of a diner in Albuquerque, NM while my mother was in the bathroom. My father moved me around quite a bit and stayed off the grid as much as possible to avoid detection from my mother. In Denver Colorado...


My mom is a SMC, a Single Mom by Choice, (emphasis on “choice” because it was her Plan A). I do not know my dad from Adam; he is a stranger to me even though his blood courses through my veins and his eyes stare back at me in the mirror. To my mom: You wanted me, or...

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I am the oldest of 8 children, consisting of 3 full brothers, 2 step siblings, a half sister and a half brother who passed away when he was 3. My parents were married. Our childhood was fairly run of the Mill, we grew up in the Burbs and lived in a time where you...

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In college I would proudly declare how I had a gay father who "came out" when I was a toddler (my parents divorced when I was 2). I would explain how I was a normal, straight, educated young woman who lived part time with my father throughout my life, and that his...

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I don't know how to talk about my feelings of discomfort and disagreement with same sex relationships. Even though I experienced the negative experience first hand, I am still nervous to speak. When I have, others have called me a bigot and said it was hateful....

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I was born to a teenage mother. According to her siblings, and even my grandmother, my birth father loved my mother very much. I heard stories over the years of how much he loved and wanted to marry her. My mother never lied in my younger years about who my birth...

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Heather G

I grew up with divorced grandparents.  When my parents divorced I felt double the shame. I remember clearly the day my mum announced she was leaving us. It was the day before her birthday and my little sister's 6th birthday was two days later. Dad said "Your Mum has a...

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My situation was unique in that my alcoholic mother and I lived with her parents until I was 8. I don't have many memories of my mother even though I shared a bedroom with her. I believe God was protecting me. I don't believe there was any physical abuse. Only...

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Nicholas Isel

My “anti-social” father passed away last year.  I only ever knew him as “Dad” throughout my childhood and wasn’t told by my mom that we weren’t biologically related until I reached the age of 15.  The first emotion I remember experiencing was a deep sense of relief.  ...

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Stories of Donor-Conceived Kids with Gay Parents- Why “family break-up” doesn’t explain their struggles.

“Am I the only one who feels this way? Am I a bad daughter because I wish I had a Dad? Is there anyone else who has 2 Moms or 2 Dads who wonders what it would be like if they were born into a normal family? Is ther anyone else who wants to be able to use the word normal without gettin a lecture on what is normal??? I dont know my real father and never will. Its weird but I miss him. I miss this man I will never know. Is it wrong for me to long for a father like my friends have?”

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Help Us Put Children's Rights First.

Them Before Us is made up of ordinary adults who are committed to putting the needs of children at the forefront of the battle surrounding the very foundation of our society - marriage and family.  Are you an ordinary person too? Does your simple blood boil when children are expected to conform to the lifestyle of adults because you understand, maybe firsthand, how hard that is on kids? And are you tired of culture framing adults as victims when we all know that kids are the ones who have to pay the price? If so, we are your people.

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