Even when the captain decides to change course, it can take up to ten miles to turn a loaded cargo ship around. Them Before Us is challenging some of the most well-funded organizations in the world, and children are their commodity, their cargo. These powerful people have money and momentum on their side but, with your help, we can turn this ship around.
You’re here which means you’re one of Us. You see the truth of this site in the faces of children you know; children paying the emotional price the adults in their lives aren’t willing to pay. Perhaps you even see that pain in the mirror. Simply knowing the truth isn’t enough, you have to take action.
Here are five ways that you can put Them Before Us.
Contemplate. Look at your own life. Really look. Only you and your spouse can save your kids from the devastation of a no-fault divorce. Only you can refuse fertility treatments that deny your children a relationship with their mother or father. Only you can reject a sexual relationship outside of a lifelong marital commitment. Only you can sacrifice your desires so that your children can have what they need. You have to be the adult. You have to do the hard thing so that your children won’t lose their fundamental rights.
Connect. Give your time, counsel, love and treasure to children who need you. Invest in the lives of kids in your world with single parents. Be the loving woman to your niece who has two gay dads. Be the protective man for the boy whose father bailed when his mother refused to abort. Be the friend who allows the child of divorce to be honest about how much they hurt and don’t be afraid to tell them their pain is legitimate and real. The world may tell you that you have no responsibility to these kids, put Them first anyway.
Communicate. Don’t just read the articles on this site. Share them. Choose a paragraph from each post and tell your world why it matters to you. We try to include the voice of children in every article so that your advocacy has a face. We make it personal because it is personal. Their story is their gift to us. Share it with whoever will listen to help make their telling of it count.
Contribute. Help Them Before Us with the resources needed to defend the rights of children. When you fuel this movement we can produce podcasts, gather stories, represent children in policy matters, and reach new audiences. The more you give, the more time we can devote to writing, speaking, producing and defending children.
Compose. Do you see yourself in the stories on this site? Do you wish that someone would have spoken for you when people were advising your parents to divorce, or use a sperm donor, or just “do what feels right” even though you shouldered the life-long cost? If so, take stock of how your loss impacted your childhood and how it continues to shape you as an adult. Then write it down and send it to Us. It may be your story that convinces others to prioritize the rights of children. Redeem your suffering by becoming the adult you wish had advocated for you as a child.
Fighting for children’s rights is a massive undertaking and it’s costly. We need all hands on deck.